I always felt so blessed to grow up with an abundance of Grandparents. 4 Great Grandparents and 4 Grandparents. With one left I have found the down side to growing up with grandparents is loosing them. And I did not just see them occasionally or on holidays, I grew up with them on either side. At every event, important moments, unimportant ones. Literally each one a street away.
I grieve the losses, I grieve for the part of my life you will miss, me actually becoming an adult, falling in love, seeing who I will finally choose to be mine after all this time of all of you wondering and teasing, having children. I so wanted to share that with all of you as you have shared your lives with me. I wanted my children to grow up the way I have and have all you amazing people in their lives. But having you and loosing you is better than never having you at all. At least when the time come I can give what pieces of you are in me.
The benefit of growing side by side is your roots will always be entangled. The love from all these different people have taught me to love the way I do. Through all the sadness I have endured the one thing I have not lost is love. The love of my family, my very amazing friends, the idea of love, it is something I have kept close to my heart while my mind sorted out everything else. And it is this love I have that will shine through when my heart feels heavy with grief and missing you. It is the love that survives in the family you all have built, you can feel it in our hugs and grasping hands, see it in our smiles, hear it in our laughs. If I believe anything anymore, its that love will see me though. So thank you for sharing your loving hearts with me, I promise to make sure that love continues to grow.
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