Like your mama, the heart knows best

Looking back, I am not sure why I doubted what my heart already knew. Through sadness and rebuilding, my heart always knew what it really wanted, and to question myself on whether or not I knew when something was right was a waste of wondering. Between my heart and my gut, I know when something is right, and when something is wrong.

I have second guessed my feelings in the past and ended up sticking it out because I had found some comfort. If I have learned anything, it is to walk away when you know it is not quite right, not hope to find what you are looking for... eventually.

I remember this time last year, to finally have had that need of being held filled, and forgetting what that longing for it had felt like. But with that longing returning I more than ever want to make sure the next embrace is more than just a warm refuge. I need a warm heart and kind soul, an understanding and open mind. Plus sparks on top of that. That isn't too much to ask is it?

At one point the idea of finding someone seemed intimidating, and still sometimes is. But the idea of finding the one who will make all the longing and wondering disappear is really an exciting adventure, one that I will regret if I shy away from. So I need to learn to trust my heart and gut, let go when needed and follow my heart when something excites it.

Through all the rain and sadness, love is the one thing that has always kept the embers going, and as that glow warms, and drives the rain away I find more pieces of myself I have been looking for. May that fire burn strong in the months ahead.