Sorting

As I scroll down I can see that nothing lately has been my words, but sometimes when you are so busy and don't have the time to sit down and sort through everything, you find little things that express how you are feeling.
It's been up and down lately, but if you trudge through the snow you eventually get where you are going, it just may take a little longer. Patience is a virtue, and I can keep myself busy until I arrive at wherever it is I want to be.
Maybe I will sit down soon and do some sorting, figure out where I am heading next :)

Truth

Stormy Weather - Ella Fitzgerald

Happy Birthday Ella, Cheers to one Soulful Diva <3 p="p">

Sweet Pea, Apple of my eye

Sweet pea
Apple of my eye
Don't know when and I don't know why
You're the only reason I keep on coming home

Sweet pea
What's all this about
Don't get your way all you do is fuss and pout
You're the only reason I keep on coming home

I like the Rock of Gibraltar
I always seem to falter
And the words just get in the way
Oh I know I'm gonna crumble
I'm trying to stay humble
But I never think before I say

Sweet pea
Keeper of my soul
I know sometimes I'm out of control
You're the only reason I keep on coming
You're the only reason I keep on coming yeah
You're the only reason I keep on coming homeAw

This is my Winter Song to You

Just one of those songs

"Winter Song"(with Ingrid Michaelson)

Bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum

bum bum bum bum bum bum

bum bum bum bum bum bum

This is my winter song to you.The storm is coming soon,it rolls in from the seaMy voice; a beacon in the night.My words will be your light,to carry you to me.Is love alive?Is love alive?Is loveThey say that things just cannot growbeneath the winter snow,or so I have been told.They say were buried far,just like a distant starI simply cannot hold.Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?This is my winter song.December never felt so wrong,cause you're not where you belong;inside my arms.bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bumbum bum bum bum bum bumbum bum bum bum bum bumI still believe in summer days.The seasons always changeand life will find a way.Ill be your harvester of lightand send it out tonightso we can start again.Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?This is my winter song.December never felt so wrong,cause you're not where you belong;inside my arms.This is my winter song to you.The storm is coming soonit rolls in from the sea.My love a beacon in the night.My words will be your lightto carry you to me.Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?

Who doesn't love love?

Need a little love in your life? Check on my board on pinterest for some love inspiring photos :)

 http://pinterest.com/tates87/who-doesn-t-love-love/

I love myself today

Sometimes the sweet uplifting quotes just don't cut it. You need something a little more badass ;)

I know myself, and I know my ruts. But this time I just ignored the fact that I was in a rut. I was doing well where things needed to be done well, like work, and school, but after all that I feel like I have no energy left for the rest.

Well that's it. Time to pour a coffee, paint my nails, and pull myself together. It's time to find a balance and do well everywhere. I need to reward the hard work so it doesn't seem so tireless, I need to know it's worth it and stay on track. This is my time to finally do it right, and I want to make sure I enjoy the sacrifices that are enabling me to get where I want to be. I don't feel like myself when I let my mopey self take over, so no more ignoring this rut, time to go from drab to fab :)

Text Me

When it comes to intimacy, is it safe to say that modern technology had robbed us of once sacred moments? I remember a time when just brushing against someone’s hand was something that could set off fireworks.. of course while appearing cool and composed on the outside. People use to live for the moments, when stolen glances, and subtle brushes were something worth writing songs, poems, and letters about. Moments that “the greats” immortalized. Don’t people still want butterflies? (The kind in tummy, not blinking on your screen) Now a day you can have an entire relationship with someone without even coming face to face. Are we missing out on moments because we are receiving that message through text? The way we communicate is changing, but at what cost?

Remember those moments when you looked across the room and someone was looking right back at you? I’ve seen people text someone in the same room and not physically acknowledge their presence, there is no romance in that! Call it old fashioned, but it’s those little sparks that ignite something that burns with endurance. At least in the world I’m living it. Sending a text doesn’t always take real courage, a gesture does People shoot of these smiley faces everyday with very little thought into it, and have become lazy with genuine conversations. . I’ll take the first time of two hands interlocking of a “;)” any day.

Tyler Lyle - Anyhow

Finally, a post!! You know when you hear something and it just moves you? :) Not feeling anything for anyone special, but I love when you hear and see something and you can't wait until you will feel moved by someone else... Yup, still hopeless!

Well I know that you don't love me now
But I'm gonna love you anyhow
And you don't see me like I see you
But I'm gonna be here when you do

I heard you say you loved me in your sleep
What I'd give to be in that dream...

Well you've had your doubts
But I'm still around
And your past, it ain't lost on me
So your careful ways- even your angry face
It's still looking pretty good to me

Well I know that what will be will be
As sure as winter finds its way to spring
So I sit here restless patiently
Until something in you moves for me

I heard you say you loved me in your sleep
What I'd give to be in that dream
When you finally bloom for me
I wonder what color you will be

Well you've had your doubts
But I'm still around
And your past, it ain't lost on me
So your careful ways- even your angry face
It's still looking pretty good to me

I'm not him and this ain't then
Open up and let me in

Well you've had your doubts
But I'm still around
And your past, it ain't lost on me
So your careful ways- even your angry face
It's still looking pretty good to me

credits

I just wanna dance, dance with you

I know the lights are out 
I know it's getting late 
But your still young, and were wide awake 
I've never seen a sky, this damn bright 
So don't go home, it just aint right 

I got a good idea 
I got a wild hair 
There's a little spot, and we can meet you there 
Take the only road, straight out of town 
Until you see the fire, baby don't slow down 

Cause we'll be up all night 
Keeping up the moon 
I just want to dance, baby dance with you 
We gonna scream and shout, until sunrise 
We wont close it down, we'll be up all night 
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/k/kip+moore/up+all+night_21012572.html ] 
Baby grab some beer, and we'll grab guitars 
Tell all your friends, and we'll write the stars 
We'll gas the fire, try to make it last 
And we'll sing it up, and you can shake your ass 

And we'll be up all night 
Keeping up the moon 
I just want to dance, baby dance with you 
We gonna scream and shout, until sunrise 
We wont close it down, we'll be up all night 

Alright 

We'll be up all night 
Gonna feel so free 
Only got one ride 
Don't need no sleep 
So baby dance my way 
And I'll pass the wine 
Wanna kiss your face 
And stay up all night 

We'll be up all night 
Keeping up the moon 
I just want to dance, baby dance with you 
We gonna scream and shout, until sunrise 
We wont close it down, we'll be up all night

I've been dreaming lately of someone. I don't know who it is, but I like it! And no, it's not those kind of dreams! Just dreams of embraces. Of holding hands, or a cuddle, and in that moment when I dreaming I feel those butterflies. I forgot how good that feels! It makes me remember what I want, and why I want it, for that feeling of contentment. Although I feel perfectly content with life right now, the other kind is just something to look forward to. Because when I wake up from those dreams I know it is going to be a good day, I can't wait until those good vibes are part of my waking life :)

Words to live by

Be Better

Life's a Garden, Dig It!

I never thought I would say this, but there is nothing like a good solid chunk of time spent gardening. It feels so rewarding when you see results, something I grew myself.  And I gotta say, it turned out alright. Not great, but not terrible either, things are growing!

Plus all the digging around gives you time to think, like a mind work-out. I am certainly enjoying it much more than I thought. This might be a hobby I will keep around. It just feels good for the soul, or something like that. 

Hey Pretty Girl can I have this dance?

Hey pretty girl, won't you look my way Love's in the air tonight You can bet you'll make this ol' boy's day Hey pretty girl, won't you look my way Hey pretty girl, can I have this dance And the next one after that Gonna make you mine there's a real good chance Hey pretty girl, can I have this dance Hey pretty girl, it feels so right Just like it's meant to be All wrapped up in my arms so tight Hey pretty girl, it feels so right Life's a long and winding ride Better have the right one by your side And happiness don't drag its feet Time moves faster than you think Hey pretty girl, I wanna take you home My momma's gonna love you She'll make me sleep on the couch, I know But hey pretty girl, I wanna take you home Hey pretty girl, lets build some dreams And a house on a piece of land We'll lant some roots and some apple trees Hey pretty girl, lets build some dreams Life's a long and winding ride Better have the right one by your side Happiness don't drag its feet And time moves faster than you think Hey pretty girl, you did so good Our baby's got your eyes And a fighters heart like I knew she would Hey pretty girl, you did so good Hey pretty girl when I see the light And it's my time to go I'm gonna thank the Lord for a real good life A Pretty little girl and a beautiful wife

Writer's itch

Rain is a good thing

Oh the simple things in life. Sometimes we take life for granted, and forget to slow down and smell the roses, so to say. Or smell the rainfall after days of heat. I have a million things on my to-do list, but nothing seems as great as some tea, my book and a cozy blanket as I listen to the rain fall into the earth. After the sun, the earth probably enjoys a good drink to replenish itself. And I think we need that as much as the earth does sometimes. After going, going, going, don’t forget to stop and recharge. After being replenished we can pick up and keep on keeping on. Dolly Parton said, “If you want a rainbow you have to put up with the rain.” And waiting for that rainbow is worth it, enjoy the lull! Life isn’t always beautiful, but it is a beautiful ride.

Midnight Swims

My longing for someone else always seems stronger in the summertime. Maybe it is because it is when I have had the most fun, and the most love, under the summer sun. I want someone to share midnight swims and kisses with. Someone to keep me warm by a fire, even if I am not cold. Someone to look up at the night sky with and smile under the stars. Life just seems so much more free in the summer, and I want to capture that. I want to start something amazing in the summer, and carry it with me the rest of the year.
And if this does not happen then I want to capture that summer fun, that feeling that exists when the days are long, and the nights are sweet and warm.
Hopeless as always, and loving every minute of it

Hopelessly Slacking

Last published post: May 10th. I sure am slacking here. It's been so long, and still I am drawing a blank. I was looking at my journal the other day, the newest one I started about a year ago I was shocked to see how little pages I have gone through. Although everything I write on here, I would have normally put on paper, but even on here I am lacking. And as much as I have written I have not written a poem in a very long time! I need to get my muse back, whatever that may be.
Although I have been slacking at writing, everything is going pretty good. School, healthy choices, my tan :p But that is not an excuse. I am going to make more of an effort to get some inspiration and get typing, writing, or at least get some inspiration.
Until Then,
The Hopeless Romantic

Spring Fever

I don't know what it is, but I just feel like everything is going right. I've found so many things lately that I love. Being daring when I cook, starting a garden, finding things on the other side of the camera. Just really doing things that make me happy. Because even though I do hope to make someone else happy one day, I'm not going to sit around and be boring until then. It's like all of a sudden I am ready for anything. I just want to keep going, take big steps through life after wandering around all this time. I find that all that wandering gave me skills from here and there, and knowledge from everything I have done to prepare me to get my ass in gear (See, not all who wander are lost!). This is my life and no one is going to live it as good as I can. Don't get me wrong, I plan on being Young, Wild & Free forever, but I really do feel like a part of me is growing up - growing anyways. I can't wait to see where this direction is taking me, I feel like I had endured the lull I did so I would be ready. Not sure what I am ready for, but I have a gut feeling this is it. Maybe I am not so hopeless anymore, just a hopeful :)

Leap of Faith

I really do feel this way right now! I feel like so much is happening and going on. I feel like everything in life is about to get better. I always remember being young, and thinking I was really going to be someone, somewhere big, doing big things. Then not too long ago I woke up and found my everyday boring, repetitive. So I started looking for hints of that inspiration that used to feel like it pumped though my veins. There are so many things I want to take on, and for once things that make ME happy. I hope I can do it all and not burn out half way through. But I guess that is what taking a leap of faith is all about. I suppose the worst thing that could happen is it does not work out. And that is much better than never doing anything at all.

Funny how a melody sounds like a memory, like a soundtrack to a July night (l)

Ever hear a song and know you could have written it yourself?





Springsteen - Eric Church


To this day when I hear that song
I see you standin' there on that lawn
Discount shades, store bought tan
Flip flops and cut-off jeans

Somewhere between that setting sun
I'm on fire and born to run
You looked at me and I was done
And we're, we're just getting started

I was singin' to you, you were singin' to me
I was so alive, never been more free
Fired up my daddy's lighter and we sang
Ooohh

Stayed there 'til they forced us out
And took the long way to your house
I can still hear the sound of you sayin' don't go

When I think about you, I think about 17
I think about my old jeep
I think about the stars in the sky
Funny how a melody sounds like a memory
Like the soundtrack to a July Saturday night
Springsteen

I bumped into you by happenstance
You probably wouldn't even know who I am
But if I whispered your name 
I bet there'd still be a spark

Back when I was gasoline 
And this old tattoo had brand new ink
And we didn't care what your mom would think
About your name on my arm

Baby is it spring or is it summer
The guitar sound or the beat of that drummer
You hear sometimes late at night 
On your radio

Even though you're a million miles away
When you hear Born in the USA
You relive those glory days
So long ago

When you think about me, do you think about 17
Do you think about my old jeep
Think about the stars in the sky
Funny how a melody sounds like a memory
Like a soundtrack to a July Saturday night
Springsteen
Springsteen

Woah-oh-oh-oh

Funny how a melody sounds like a memory
Like a soundtrack to a July Saturday night
Springsteen
Springsteen
Woah Springsteen

Woah-oh-oh-oo

Although I have not been writing, I have sure been thinking. I have all these ideas jotted down, inspired from here and from there, I just needed a chance to sit down and stitch them together.

Sometimes thinking back can be a funny thing. Thinking back on what we remember, or what we choose to remember. It seems that when I am letting someone in, I tend to ignore all the cons of someone. But in the end it is these things that we seem to remember the most, probably because it was what we were left hurt by.

But let’s not forget, that in the first place we ignored these because we paid attention to the pros. Or at least what we liked about them. What we were drawn to. I’ve never really thought back to the beginning because the end is the first thing that pops into my mind so I dismiss the idea to quickly to remember the good. Or at least the good you left with from that person.

There is the reason I love classic rock, and a well-made sandwich. There is my keen ability to now spot a douche-bag. The reason I know good guys really do exist, and the reason I know bad ones do too. I have learned that good things might not always work out, but once it a while it will. You have to keep trying so you don’t miss your moment.

“There are all kinds of love in the world, but never the same love twice.” Of course we will remember the bad, it happened. And it feels so bad because you once cared about that person. But the bad means it didn’t work out, so take what good you got and move on in time to what is to come. Each person will leave what they will on us, metaphorical marks. And you just have to let them heal. Don’t rush it, with time it won’t feel so bad. You will just be left the reminder of how to make something better the next time. The next love, whatever it comes as, will be a different love.

Sometimes you have to “settle for living in misery because we are afraid of change, of things crumbling to ruins, ruin is a gift, ruin is the road to transformation. “ To have your heart broken means that you have tried for something, and broken means that you have the chance to put things back together however you choose.
If that isn't Hopeless...

If I would have to describe myself sometimes, I would respond with “It’s messy and it’s me.” Some people may disagree if they base it on the fact that I am clean, and organized/borderline neat freak. But when I say that, I am referring to my emotional retardation :p lol. Maybe that’s why the rest of my life is so organized and neat, because it is the part of my life that I can control. Controlling the way I feel sometimes would be as easy as controlling the weather. Sometimes all you can do it put on rain boots and hope you don’t get too wet. After all, when the rain is all gone, you are left with green grass and new things beginning to grow.
Sometimes it seems that I have a blind, senseless, bottomless trust. Sometimes this trait (or flaw, depending on how you look at it) leaves me sad. Sometime it leaves me ecstatically happy, and then sad again. But I guess that’s who I am, and regardless of the results I do believe possessing this trait makes me a good person. And why would I want to change that right?
I have been thinking about that a lot lately. What is it that makes me “me”? Is it the fact that I am a hopeless romantic? Or is it my love of painted nails, wine and fun? Then there is my serious grown-up side that only exists Monday-Friday, 9-5. There are my amazing friends, and not so amazing ones. There are my insecurities, my love of dancing, and my eternal child that I cannot suppress. Then there are my faults, which if I look I know are many. None of this bothers me, most of the time. But when it comes to the business of growing up, the business of finding someone and falling in love, I cannot help but wonder about me, and how all of these things that make me “me” and what that means about what is to come.
I am excited about the future. I cannot wait to see what finds me, and I secretly hope that all patience and the things that I have endured mean there is something extra special. I need something extra special. Because, although I feel ready to settle down sometimes, there is no chance I will just settle. And believing I deserve that is something new for me, and something that makes “me” great. It took a lot to get to that place, and there is still so much room to grow. I’m sure I have said this before but “Life is a journey, not a destination” and everything along the way is part of the journey, needed so we can arrive at the destination we are meant for.

Sunday (l)

Oh my unrealistic ideas of love

I woke up sick today, and didn't even think I was going to post. But who am I kidding, being as hopelessly romantic as I am? I could not resist. I have been single on this day for 8 years. And it has never stopped me from celebrating my love of LOVE. I love the idea of love, the dream of love, and the future love that I have yet to find. I watched some post secret videos for inspiration and there is was. The need to write.

I want to find that someone who makes me want to break down the walls I have built around my heart. I don't even think I realized they were there. I am not afraid of being lonely. I have been alone for so long that I find comfort in my own little world. I am afraid of someone puncturing that world, I am afraid of being with another person. Yet I cannot wait to find them. I think it may be the biggest challenge, letting myself be with someone else instead of just myself. But when I find them, I hope I can find the courage outside of those walls.

I want someone who makes me smile and laugh, someone who loves my curls and my quirks. God knows I have a lot of them. I want a lot of things, but when I find that person I want to forget all the things I want because I will be so caught up in the moment, in them. Maybe I won't have to spend a ninth year alone, maybe I will. But I will never let this day or any other make me sad for being alone.
As hopeless as I am I will always love LOVE <3
Happy Valentine's Day!

Postsecret - Love

So sometimes a spark is just a spark, and then it is gone. But sometimes it catches, ignites and turns into a full blown fire. A fire that can give you comfort and warmth. A fire that you can sit in front of all night long and watch it change and grow in awe. But let's not forget the lesson we instilled in us since childhood. Don't play with fire. You can get burned.
However, I am trying not to think about the getting burned yet, even though it is there in the back of mind. I am still trying not to jump to conclsuions and head somewhere I am not even really going to. But if you don't take that risk, that first step, you won't end up anywhere except for where you have already been.
"To get somewhere you have never been, you must do something you have never done." - Mark Twain.
So here is to Mark Twain, not getting burned, and taking chances. Even though in the morning, all that is left is a pile of ashes, sometimes there is smouldering coals just waiting to be that roaring fire again.

Just a spark. You can rub to stones together all you want and feel like nothing is ever going to happen. But all it takes is one little spark to see the fire roaring in your minds eye. However, let's not forget that sometimes it is what it is. Just a spark.
And this is just a thought.
Until I have more,
The Hopeless Romantic

Put on your old Black Dress and grab your Dancing Shoes

Lessons learned

As I have stated in my blog name that this is about :"Lessons learned and so obviously not learned". It seems lately it is the learning, and using those lessons learned that is the more dominant of the two. When it comes to something I would normally do, for example, jumping to conclusions, I find myself mind reeling back and pausing to reflect if that is good choice or not. Like when I meet someone and talk, and smile and keep in touch sometimes by that point I have envisioned what it would be like to be with that person, ext. OK, sometimes I still do a little but in the back of my mind I am telling myself that it is a silly notion and I shouldn't do that. That inner voice is there, and I am listening! Because I remember doing that so many times before, and in the end you are more disappointed with not having the things you envisioned rather than what was really there.
Now lessons not learned. Wouldn't it just be easier to just be foolish. Believe every word, and get carried away. This is almost as bad as dieting, which I am not very good at either. But it takes work being good! It is easier to be bad and irresponsible!! But I cannot let myself be flattered so easily which usually results in me ready to give everything into something that might not really be what I think it to be. I can't forget everything about a person because they can make me smile. Well I could, but I sure as hell shouldn't. Otherwise all my broken hearts, whether self induced or not, will have been in vain. I want the next time to be amazing, to be worth all this waiting. I just need to be strong, and keep an arms distance until I know it is someone worth opening them for an embrace.
Until then,
The Hopeless Romantic

Let the Blog posts roll....

Ahh!! After three months I am finlly hooked up to the internet from the comfort of my own home :) I feel excited to have it at my finger tips again. Unfortunatly there is also bandaids covering a few of them, so typing is challenging. But now that it's here, I will think of some insightful romantic things to say and get back to you.
Until Then,
The Hopeless (and apparently clumbsy) Romantic

No more Mr. Nice Guy

So I was reading some book, simply to pass the time. I did not think it would be amazing, or make my top 20, but it certainly struck a note. It’s a book about a small town and high school and all the things that go with it. I found it struck a chord so close to home that I could have been reading my own diary. (Yes I had one.) I remember my mom, and many others telling me that high school is such a small part of your life, (even if at the time it seems like your whole world) and it’s true. People who peak in high school and think back on it as their glory days have another thing coming when real life hits. But at the time when it is your world and your world comes crashing down I do believe it contributes to shaping what is to come next.

For some reason I have seemed to have held onto certain things that maybe I should have let go of along time ago. Certain people even. There is something to say about people who have been in your lives forever, it gives you bragging rights. "Oh, we’ve been friends forever!" But just because they have been in your life, doesn’t mean they have been there for you. When the bragging stops ringing true, perhaps it is time to move on. There are certain strings that should have been cut a long time ago. I should have cut them with the knives that I pulled out of my back, and my front. I should have stopped waiting for, and trying to please people who simply expected me to wait/please.

There is a difference between being a good friend and a doormat, and I am just starting to realize that. I have amazing people in my life, people who make me happy and make it easy to be there for them. I need to just forget about my “friends” instead of being angry about the way things have happened. I need to be brave, and not a bitch. Stand up for me, because I deserve it. I deserve good friends.
No more Mr. Nice Guy