Rest of 2003

So I was reading this study. If you have ever had a one stand then you can relate. If you haven't, then you should. (kidding) When and man and woman have intercourse and the woman climaxes her body releases a chemical with tricks your mind into feeling the sensation and liking someone. Hence why women always want to cuddle. In the case of a one night stand it leaves the female feeling like she likes that person, wants to be with them. My advice, (1) Don't cuddle. (2) Don't let them spend the night. (3) Just wait it out and week and those feelings should be gone. Guys on the other hand can walk away, no harm, no foul. I am aware that this is not always the case though.
Here is my second thought. Is the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else? It sort of relates back to the first thought. Then it would leave feeling like you want this new person. Sure, it works in the case leaving the memory of the first person in the dust, but by the time are you ready to forget this new person then you might have to repeat the cycle, which could result in being a slut. Which also might relay back to some self-esteem issues. (Let's not get into that one)
Well anyways, none is this is either romantic or relevant to 2003 when I was 15 and still a virgin, but it was just something I was thinking about. Kind of get it out there since this conversation wouldn't be so relevant with my friends and their committed relationships. So here is the rest of 2003, unlike 2002 we can tackle it in two posts.
Most of these poems are written with as much love as I have probably ever felt for a person. So here is to you, bastard.
*
Falling Carelessly
I feel I may be falling for you
In every way I can
I fall for you when you kiss my lips
And when you hold my hand

All the little things you do
You take my breath away
It’s times like this I fell for you
At every little thing you say

I’ve never felt so intrigued
By anyone before
You always leave me wondering
Always wanting more

I know that I will land gently
When all this falling is done
I’ll be glad I’ve landed in your arms
Because I feel that you are the one
*
Blissful Escape
I hear your voice
An angel whispering in my ear

I feel your touch
Like silk rubbing against me

You lips brush against my neck
Sends cool winter chills

Your moist kiss lingers on my skin
The dewy morning grass

I feel your breath dance across my shoulder
A warm summer breeze

Your fingers trace around my face pushing hair away
And it tickles like the evening rain

I feel your hand intertwined with my own
Sweet and soothing like rose petals

Your eyes stare and get lost in mine
Blissful escape
*
Till the day we are apart
Amazing feelings of butterflies
Amazing thoughts that fly me high
Wonderful daydreams in my head
I need a reality check again and again

Total bliss in your arms
Or anytime I am with you
Now that you are finally mine
I know that I will never feel blue

Walking on air and dancing on clouds
Is how I feel now all the time
I know that these new sensations I have
Are only because you are mine

This new crisp feeling of happiness
Is something I hold close to my heart
I know this feeling will stay with me
Until the day we are apart
*
Smiling in the Moonlight
This poem is actually the third in the series. The other two can be found in my earlier posts. Maybe when I am done posting all my poems I will post them together. They were written over 2-3 years, but about the same person and the different stages our feelings developed over. Told you I never learn.

The stars shine bright in the sky
They shine as if they knew
About these feelings that I have
Each star could represent all my different feelings for you

The cool autumn air
Chills my nose and cheeks tonight
But all these feelings keep me warm
Making everything so right

I walk under the stars
As I dream about loving you
Leaves crunch beneath my feet
Like the crackling excitement of something new

A smile dances across my face
As the stars dance across my eyes
Twinkling with anticipation and joy
Because I have the perfect guy

I feel myself falling for you
Like the leaves fall from the trees
All wonderful feelings to me

I look up at the moon tonight
As it’s shining down on me
I smile in the moonlight
Because you finally belong to me
*
Through and Through
I gasp to try and catch my breath
And calm my heart’s wild beat
I try to tame these butterflies
And this dancing feeling from my head to my feet

I try to hold this secret in
But you make it hard to do
Because you capture my heart and steal my breath
Making all my thoughts come back to you

I want to hold you close to me
When you can’t be by my side
I want to stand on the tallest mountain
And tell the whole world you are mine

Nothing else matters now
Now that I have you
Because you mean the world to me and I’ll love you through and through
*
Jeffers
This is for my Great-Grandfather, Rest is Peace

I cried a tear for you today
Because it finally hit me that you have gone away
It rolled down my face and off my chin
On this cold winter day

I remember all the times we shared
Those days you made me laugh
I can’t think of anything I wouldn’t give
To have those precious days back

But I know you are somewhere better
Somewhere safe and warm
A place where you can finally relax
And be free from this world of harm

On this cold winter day
I wipe my tears away
I remember all the times we shared
And I know we’ll have them again one day
*
Escape
The Sun and moon could do no justice
Nor the heavens high above
The ocean depths is no companion
To this precious love

I could travel the world many times
Or fly to outer space
But there is nothing out there that I couldn’t find
From just glancing upon your face

Give me the finest things a girl could want
Let me do all there is to do
But without you none of these things would be worth it
Because I am nothing without you

Cupid, Venus, nor Casanova
Could put my heart into words
This feeling I have within my heart
Is to remain unheard

No words could define my true soul
Since you have become a part of me
Because you created all these new feelings
That cannot be heard, only seen

So I will show how I feel
Because this all just feels so right
Take me now and let’s escape into the perfect night
*

Oh, was love ever that sweet? Maybe before one night stands and the challenge of getting over people.
I always thought once I got over that person, that it was never really love. That I just thought it was because I was in love with love, not with him. I was sure it was never love, because someone I loved would never hurt me that much. But I guess people you love can actually hurt you the most, with all you have invested in them and all they know about you, they know exactly what to do to make you feel like you just died a little inside. When people you love do things that hurt, it hurts more than if some random person did it. It takes your breath away and someone has to remind you to breath.
But reading these poems again I realize I did love him. Which I think made it so much easier to hate him after all that went down. They always say there is a fine line between love and hate. I think because they are both the strongest emotions you can feel.
LoL, I just realized how different the thoughts are before I post them poems and the remarks after. That is because I write my intro, paste the poems, then proof read which changes my emotions completely from when I started the post. Oh well. Until next time,
The Hopeless Romantic x0x