Well life sure is funny. There is no magic answer or person to make everything better, and sometimes the people you think may be a part of that answer are really just another part of the journey that are meant to show you all the things you love about yourself that you are not willing to sacrifice for another.

Its been a dark couple of weeks, even before the bad news. But I know somewhere deep down those sparks that used to light up my eyes and emanate from me are down in there, how strange it is that it takes such a loss for me to want to dig down and find it. I wish I could have done it for you and you could have saw me at my brightest, but if you can't handle the shadows than you may not deserve to bask in the glow of my love.

Being faced with continuing on this journey, beside me now empty feels trying, like I have a challenge ahead of me, but there is not a day I have not made it through yet. But that does not dull the pain that comes with losing someone you love, or the shock that things really were not as great as you thought. How long will it take for me to not want to reach out for you, or to train my mind not to day dream about the future we no longer have? Who knows, but my life motto this week is "Oh Well".

Don't want me anymore? Oh well...
Don't like all the life style choice I make? Oh Well...
Can't handle the fact that I do what I want? Oh well... someone will be able to.